I had an idea. To understand it, you'll need to understand this: there is such a thing as being Carbon Neutral, where you plant trees or whatever to make up for your fucking up of the ozone layer. (Wikipedia has an article on it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carbon_offset.) Anyway, I have an idea: what if labs that use animal testing had to be Ethically Neutral.

It'd work like this: for every cute little monkey you feed viagra and cut apart its brains apart, you have to have another cute little monkey who lives in huge indulgence with all the bananas you can imagine.

Could you imagine, though?