Guy Pearce: Best Actor Ever?

Who doesn't like Guy Pearce? Zero people. He's pretty much an awesome actor. He was in that movie, Momento, remember? It was the one about the guy who got hit in the head by this guy who killed his wife (talk about double-wammy!) and made him lose his memory. Well, not lose his memory, he just had no short-term memory, so he couldn't make new memories, so he had big trouble trying to exact revenge. It was pretty much a great movie.

Many years ago, when I saw the flick in theatres, I had to remember to go to the cinema instead of home, so I wrote a reminder on my hand. If you saw the movie, this is incredibly funny. Otherwise, it sorta falls flat. Frankly, even if you did see the movie, it still falls flat. Sometimes I miss on the jokes. Like now. Dead miss.

Sorry, everybody.

Oh, right. Guy Pearce. So, I just saw this commercial for this new movie with Guy Pearce in it called First Snow. It looks to be about Guy Pearce going to a fortune teller who tells him some bad news (how ironic!): He will die the first time he sees snow. I saw this and I was like, "what the hell? Why doesn't he just move to Los Angeles! We don't ever get snow." Then I remembered two things,

1. It just snowed this past winter, for the first time in my life. I missed it. It was in Malibu. You can't win them all.
2. The cost of living is outrageous. Not Tokyo outrageous, but, like, it's seriously hard to live here.

You can't subsist here on minimum wage, especially when you consider that you need a car. I mean, I commute via public transportatoin, so it's not like it's impossible, but it's a bitch, for sure. And, if you want to go to Holllywood, bad luck. It's just impossible. I mean, let's say I wanted to go see these clubs in Hollywood my sister is always going to (she's cooler than me), which I don't, and I wanted to get home at some point (which I would.) I'd need to take a bus home, but they stop running at like midnight, so I'd have to take a cab.

But really, a cab? I'm not made of money. One would have to be composed of dollar bills to possibly afford a cab ride further than the length of the vehicle. Or, I could try to find a young lady and wine and dine her into her room to exchange sex for a roof over my head. But that wouldn't work, because I'm pretty much romantically involved, and frankly, my sex is worth more than a roof over my head.

It's worth a breakfast, too, and I like to cook, so I wouldn't want to let her make me anything. Plus, I'm vegan, and I'd have to ask is there butter in this?, are there eggs in this?, is there blah blah blah. And, you know, I'm with Baylee, which is another reason that it wouldn't work. That's love I guess.*

I'd sleep with Guy Pearce, though, even if he didn't gimme breakfast. I'd be cool with it. He seems like a romantic guy. He played a queer in Priscella, Queen of the Desert. Haven't heard of that flick? Freakin' wikipedia it or something.

IMBD, maybe.

* Like every girl I know who reads this will flip about this dumb line. The dudes will be like, "Am I seriously reading this load of shit? Fuck this, I'm going back to Maddox or TuckerMax or something like that. Something with an X at the end. Or three x's"

PS: Here's your grain of salt.

Babe

This is a picture of Baylee. She is pretty much a babe. And, a hot one. Not like Babe, the pig, though. She is basically pretty far away from such a description as one could imagine. Except in this photo the color is all red, so the young lady's face turns up pink. Pink! Basically not the case. So, just imagine that the color is different and you'll get an idea of what bombshell she is.

But, really, the babeness shines through, big time, See? Of course you do! The shine-thoroughness is what we in the Blogosphere call self-evident.

If you touch her I will bite your face off, and then blog about it.

On Love

This is a picture of me. I am putting the moves on Baylee, my girlfriend, by eating the sandwich pictured with enormous grace. I have been with her for like, 2 years. That's a lot, for my age. I'm going on twenty. Twenty! That's ten percent of my life! That's like, if I was thirty, we would be going steady for three years.

I guess that isn't that impressive.

But, if we are still together ten years from now, it'd be like we've been dating for a third of our life, which is two thirds between the two of us. And imagine what that would be like when we're eighty? Eighty and eighty is one-sixty, and two thirds of that is one-hundred six years, seven months, and six days!! I have been dating this girl since I was negative eighty-seven years old! Talk about commitment!

I am eating a vegan sandwich. I have been doing this for a few years. Not a little more than a century.